It's now two months into my journey of being a widow. There are some good days and some not-so-good ones! A few things have surprised me.
The first is how long it has taken to do all the paperwork of advising all the companies of my new situation. My training and jobs have been in administration and I am still doing all the admin for our Church, so I decided I would do all the legal requirements myself. The fact that there was an undisputed will and that everything was in joint names meant that there was no need for me to hire a solicitor or lawyer.
What I didn't count on was how long it would take to find out what forms to fill in, and then the time spent in digging out all the information to fill them in. On top of that, every organisation required something different in the way of certification. It meant quite a few trips to visit the JPs at the local shopping centre. Thankfully all the important things are now done and finalised and I saved myself a lot of money by doing it myself!
The other thing that surprised me is that I don't have much motivation to do any craft. In fact for quite a few weeks the only motivation I seemed to have was to look after my vegetable garden. With much more time on my hands, I expected I would be right into doing lots of stitching, but I'm not! I am enjoying doing some fairly mindless Granny Square crochet while I watch TV and have put together a bag, but that's about the limit.
What I have enjoyed doing is SORTING!
With more time on my hands, I decided I will start listening to music again. We have a very good 40 year-old record player which wasn't working. Google helped me find what was wrong; I bought the part, fitted it and everything now works perfectly. But the record collection was in such a mess! I had great delight in sorting it into classifications and then further putting it in alphabetical order. Now it is so easy to find which record I would like to enjoy.
Then there was the CD collection. When I brought home all the CD's that I played for hubby in the Aged Care, they were just plonked anywhere. Besides that, everything was very dusty through lack of use. So you guessed it - everything came out, was dusted, classified and alphabetically sorted. I've been listening to records, so haven't benefitted yet from being able to find which CD I want, but nevertheless it is very satisfying to have everything in order, and of course they will get used soon!
It's the day of digital everything, but I seemed to have accumulated an awful lot of physical paperwork over the last couple of months. Space left in the writing desk was minimal so it was time to see what I could get rid of. A box of cards caught my eye. I have a friend who makes the most beautiful cards by recycling used ones, so it was time to sort them out and give them away. There were some sad moments as I found cards given to me by my darling husband but there were smiles as I found hand-drawn ones from the grandchildren. These special ones won't be given away!
Having been through the process of all the legalities of an estate, I wanted to ensure it was an easy task for my family when they have to handle my affairs. My important papers were all well organised with everything in well-marked folders. However, I realised they would have to wade through a huge amount of paperwork to actually find what was needed in all those folders. They don't really want the house plans, extensions, upgrades etc when all they need is the Title Deeds! I have therefore gone through all my folders and pulled out just the paperwork they will need. The next question was how to store it safely. For that I have purchased a fireproof, waterproof hard bag with a handle. It is just ideal and I can also store my computer backups and things in it.
So I have found all this sorting very therapeutic and calming. It is wonderful to be happily doing tasks that require the absolute minimum of thinking power with a great sense of achievement on completion!
I have even started 'sorting' out my rockery which was being overtaken by the fountain grass. That was a much more energetic activity with still quite a bit to be done. But there's no hurry!
I am so thankful to God for His support, comfort and strength when I need it most ... and for getting me sorting! I know that some time in the future I will be more motivated to do some more craft, but again, there's no hurry!
God bless you.
Val
